Sunday, October 22, 2006

Shiver


You caught me off guard; I didn’t see that coming.
It’s not like I didn’t know this day would come,
But to be honest, I wasn’t quite prepared.

You crept inside,
Stealthily,
Disarmingly,
Confusingly,
And leave the next step to me?

But it’s you that has the master plan!
It’s you on whom I rely!
I only fear that my affections will cause you
To see me as I truly am.

Scared, weak,
Impotent by the thought of your love
Your caress, your fragrance.
This is my penance for squandering away, as
Past gifts lay before my feet.

You are the enforcer of my karmic balance,
Yet I delight in this series of events.
I bask in the thought of you wrenching my heart,
As I have grown tired of running,
Running,
Running away
From myself.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

GTS - My first time here. Love your site. I think you're on to something.
Your poem contemplates an excellent conflict - the risks of truly loving. As I read the line "I only fear that my affections will cause you to see me as I truly am" The word "Vulnerable" popped into my head before I read the next line. And there it was - scared, weak etc.
The goal, I believe, is to get to a place where you can allow yourself to love and be loved and not be diminished by a change or withdrawal of affections. To be strong in your loving and allow love in. That can only come after one forgives oneself and loves oneself again. Nice poem.

Anonymous said...

I have felt your exact words, an excruciating love. Very touching poem, just the right title.

MonkeyMom said...

Mmm...and now I know why this won.

How true...how beautiful to both enjoy and resist being tamed.